Your 4-Year-Old: Peer Pressure

Peer Pressure, Preschooler Style

Peer pressure is generally associated with school-age children, but it can begin in the preschool years. It starts in a benign enough way: Your child wants to make his buddies happy and fit in. Understanding that everyone doesn't have to be alike in order to get along comes from practice and your own good example.
最後一句話我一定要牢記！！小孩的行為都來自父母的親身示範，了解每個人的不同點、每個人都有特殊性，是很重要的！不必要每個小孩都要一樣！！

Your 4-year-old now
Don't be surprised if you encounter a scenario like this: All of the sudden, your son spurns his beloved Spiderman toy. Ask why, and you find out that his friends told him that Superman is king. Spiderman's a wimp. Your son is trying to be like his new pals.

Even at 4, peer pressure is a reality. In fact, this is often when it enters your child's life, as he attends preschool and spends more free time playing with friends. Your child is more adept now at reaching out to other children and playing cooperatively.小馨的同儕壓力似乎不明顯，不過有時會聽她說，xxx不跟我玩、今天xxx有跟我一起玩耶，好高興！不知道這樣算不算同儕壓力？不過至少很明顯的，她與小朋友接觸愈多、影響也愈大，是因為她是獨身女的關係嗎？如果她還有其他兄弟姊妹，應該比較不會受同儕影響吧？
He's aiming to please, wanting to get along and fit in. You may, for similar reasons, begin to hear things like, "Claire has a TV in her room. Can I have one?" 哈哈哈！這點倒是沒聽她講過，她與同儕的似乎比較少，也許是因為白天都在園所，老師都是公平地、不會有有獨特待遇的關係吧！
Your best response is to gently explain that different people have different ideas about what they like or enjoy, and that's okay. Families have different rules, too. Remember that peer pressure can be a positive force; it's amazing what kids will do when they spy a friend doing it. Send them to a pal's for dinner and they may come home proudly boasting they ate green beans or some other food they won't go near at home.
唉唉！因為家裡只有小馨一個小孩，我一直想找她的好朋友到家裡playdates，不過我與這些把拔馬麻都不熟，人家大概也不會讓自己的小孩到我們家玩，因此她一直缺乏玩伴，不過在國外，這樣的情形好像很普遍哩！

Your life now
Here's a good line to teach your child: "May I please be excused?" Young kids have shorter attention spans than adults. They might not last as long at a lengthy meal or during a visit. Giving them a polite way to bow out can head off misbehavior.