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育兒．持家．愛自己
shin mami
我們都在朝著愛與理解中前進，幸福是必然的!
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Hi~ 小寶真是可愛
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共11週的課程結束了！
What, me lie? Five-year-olds are pretty good at distinguishing truth from fiction, but they still fail to tell the truth on occasion. This happens for a number of different reasons. Sometimes they lie in order to avoid disappointing you or to escape punishment. Sometimes they just like to see the ruckus that results if you show a lot of emotion when you catch them in a lie. Your 5-year-old now "I didn't do it," your child shrieks. It doesn't matter that you saw her throw the ball that shattered your grandmother's lamp. But fortunately, lying at this age doesn't necessarily mean your child is destined for delinquency. Try not to erupt or punish harshly. If you can discover why she lied, you can handle it more appropriately. Most likely, she's worried about getting punished or disappointing you. Kids this age don't fully understand that deceit is adding to the problem. Sometimes 5-year-olds even deny wrongdoing just to get a rise out of you. Take care not to try to catch your child in a lie. If you saw the incident, don't then ask, "Did you break the lamp?" You just handed her an opportunity to lie. Instead say, "I saw what happened. You know you're not supposed to throw balls in the house. Help me clean up." Stress the importance of telling the truth, and set a good example. Make sure your child knows that you love and trust her to do the right thing. Your life now One of the easiest healthy-pantry shifts you can make for your family is to swap sugary sodas and juices for water and low-fat milk. Your child is beginning to notice what other kids eat and drink. So don't let peer pressure influence what she drinks in negative ways. And now that your little consumer has big eyes, this can be a good time to kick the parental soda habit, too.
Pushing buttons Even "good" kids show flashes of defiance(敷衍、虛應故事）. Keep this natural tendency from erupting into a larger problem by making sure your rules are realistic and well understood. Responding with a big reaction (and letting your annoyance be clear) only encourages your child to defy（藐視） you more. The best way to avoid getting backed into a corner is to not rise to the bait. Your 5-year-old now Most 5-year-olds have outgrown the tantrum stage. But that doesn't mean they're done pushing your buttons. Defiance — sticking out a tongue or refusing to clean up a mess — is a normal way for children to test how far they can go. Handling defiance requires walking a fine line. While you don't want to let your child get away with disrespectful behavior, you don't want to give it too much attention either. Yelling and harsh punishments often lead to more bad behavior.打罵教育通常會導致小孩更壞的行為出現，這點我也同意，我也知道這樣不好，有時真不知道要怎麼教育她，加上自己的脾氣忍耐度有限，通常也管不了這麼多了，不過事後我會後悔.. What helps most: having defined limits in the first place. As much as kids may rail against the rules, they take comfort from their structure. Make sure your child understands the rules in advance, then point out transgressions matter-of-factly. And try to be understanding. If your child is having trouble following a rule, talk with him about it. Maybe you need to tweak the rule — or your expectations. 規則先訂清楚、先說好很重要，我會在時間到之前幾分鐘提醒她，讓她預作準備，而她通常也會遵守規定，「如果小孩對遵守規則有困難，要跟她談談」，感覺老美的教育就是將小孩當作大人一樣，或者說視他為一個independent adult，不像亞洲式強迫式的教育方式，這也是我一直在思考的！ 題外話： 一直覺得小馨的個性很好，老師說小馨上思達數學時不專心，惹老師生氣，我問小馨有沒有哭，她說有，但沒讓眼淚流下來...聽了我好心疼，不過，她馬上又轉換心情，說誰誰誰也不乖、也被老師罵....她自己被罵這件事似乎沒放在心上，心境轉換地很好呢！ Reduce the number of opportunities for defiance. Where you can, offer choices. 是的！給小孩選擇權也是一個好方法，而不要小孩一味遵從唯一的方法"Do you want to put your shoes on here or in the car?" Give ample warnings before transitions to new activities. Ease control over things that truly don't matter. Will the earth stop spinning if he wears the same shirt to school three days in a row? Be sure you notice when your child is behaving well and praise him for it. Your goal, in the end, is not to make him behave out of fear but out of a desire to do the right thing. Your life now Try not to be abrupt about announcing bedtime. It's a rare child who will drop whatever he's doing, or rise from the TV mid-program, and go straight to his pajamas without a fuss. Five-year-olds do best with a reminder that bedtime is coming, followed by a relaxed transition to bed. Rather than ending the day with a bang, make it a quiet time in which you can all relax and reflect on how the day went. 說到睡覺時間，小馨真的長大了！從不需要我唱歌、不需要我拍拍、甚至也不太需要我講故事了，我就知道她又大了一些。有時她進房間看到我在看電視，她會要我繼續看而她可以自己睡，我當然不會這樣做，我會將燈熄掉、跟她一起睡覺，只能說小馨太貼心了。
Tone and meaning Your child uses not just her words but her tone of voice during play or conversations to convey meaning. Playing with dolls, a girl might use a very high voice, for example. Or a child might use grown-up inflections when talking to a teacher or other grown-up. This shows you how closely she's watching and listening to you. 哈哈哈m，好好玩喔！小朋友會用聲調語氣來扮演角色！實際情況的確也是這樣，我一直覺得小馨是很女性的小孩，她就是喜歡扮家家酒、扮獸醫、當大姐姐....一樣地照顧小孩病人，而且都是很溫柔的語調，真是有趣極了！ （附記：上次聽她和雅雅玩，她問雅雅要什麼顏色的水彩筆，雅雅說blue，小馨回說，妳不用講英文...) Your 5-year-old now Have you noticed how your child's speech changes depending on the person she's chatting with? When she's talking to her baby brother, her voice may become higher and more sing-song. "How's my wittle baby?" she says slowly and softly. As you enter the room, she switches to her more grown-up voice. "Daddy, can I give him the rattle?" It's back in toddlerhood that children begin to discern what kind of speech is appropriate in a situation and start to adjust accordingly. But 5-year-olds are enthralled by this idea in their play and everyday life. How to form a network with other parents You can use this to your advantage with discipline: If you want to give a message emphasis, try whispering it rather than shouting. It will have more impact precisely because it's so different from everyday speech. Sing peppy rhymes during chores like cleaning up to make the job seem more fun. When you read together, use different voices for each character in a story. This is also a great time to introduce the etiquette rule that children don't speak to adults the same way they speak to their friends or siblings. Your life now At the playground, keep a watchful eye on your child to make sure she's behaving in ways that are civil and safe. You'll want to be able to intervene if there is hitting, kicking, or dangerous play like rock throwing. But stop short of hovering. Give your child room to behave like, well, a kid. That includes testing limits (within reason) and trying to work out disagreements with playmates on her own.
Game boys (and girls!) Not too many years ago, no one thought about 5-year-olds playing video games. But in many areas, video games have become a standard kind of play even for young children, as gaming systems have become prevalent and more games are available for all ages. The habits and rules you create now about computer games will shape how your child views such play in the future. 這裡的video games指的應該是ipad 或iphone上的小遊戲吧！ 的確，這幾年平版電腦及智慧型手機的普及，小孩子都好厲害，知道怎麼玩games，雖然小馨沒有玩電腦的gmaes（但在南投家裡有玩，現在因為電腦被鎖住了，小孩子也都不能玩了），我還是覺得她靜態的活動太多，動態活動太少了！雖然住在都市，但這不是藉口，希望她能跑跑跳跳，發洩一下精力才好！ Your 5-year-old now Your child is gaining the coordination and mental ability to play more complex computer games — and his interest may be growing, too. Five-year-olds love to copy friends and bigger kids. But many computer games (whether played online or on handheld units or the TV) are potentially addictive. 玩games會上癮，連大人都會何況小孩，所以我也盡量提醒自己多跟小馨相處，在一起時就不要滑手機，免得小馨老是說「為什麼媽媽可以玩、我卻不行」？ Increasingly, researchers believe that playing these games activates dopamine, a brain chemical that makes children want to keep playing them again and again. In addition, frequent use of computer games ups a child's risk of obesity, as excessive game time is time not spent in more active play. 而且上癮玩games還會導致肥胖！這點我相信，老是坐著打電腦、滑手機，運動量自然不夠，會肥胖也是正常可想而知的！ Hold off buying a game system as long as possible. Strictly monitor which games your child plays and for how long. Even active game systems like Wii should be a complement to active indoor and outdoor play, not a replacement for it. Bracket game time with active play. Don't allow snacking while playing. Follow age guidelines in choosing games. Your life now It can be startling when the child you now think is old enough to "know better" tries to hit you. Five-year-olds are struggling with self-control. When it happens, don't overreact — but do act firmly. Hold his hands and acknowledge his feelings while restating the no-hitting rule: "I know you feel very mad. But you may not hit me or anybody else. Hitting hurts."
難得天氣不錯，應該讓小孩出去動一動，因此就讓小馨騎著bike繞了7圈，原本要繞10圈的，不過觀察一下發現她的腳太長，踏板踩到底時腳還是呈現90度，讓她騎的時候頗為吃力，決定應該要去腳踏車行調整一下坐墊。 中午呢...? 一群人到深坑吃中餐，其中聊到六月份wy要回來，然後要我們請吃飯的事情，因為老公升等大概沒問題了，我回說wy不是也升等了嗎？ 討厭的人竟然說，她請過你們多少次了？也應該換你們了吧！ 我當場很不悅地說，都是一家人，請來請去都很正常，不要去比誰請誰多、誰出得少... 小慧也馬上打圓場說，對啦對啦！不用這樣比來比去，其實姐姐原本就要請大家出去度假過夜，可是大家時間好像不允許，才改成吃飯.... 唉，怎麼有這麼計較的人？幸好老公脾氣好不會生氣，不過我聽了真的蠻火大的！也許我跟他們還不是一家人，很難同理心吧！
Physically, your child is getting bigger, stronger, and faster. Channel her energy and abilities into the many different types of activities she's now ready to try. Provide lots of opportunity for physical play, including playdates with new friends. Not only will she burn off some of this excessive energy, she's likely to sleep better come bedtime. 嗚嗚...好可惜，台灣不流行playdates，或者說媽媽沒這個勇氣，邀請她的朋友到家裡玩，其實我們家很大，玩個半天（一下午或一個早上）就可以讓小馨忙個半死，而且可以拓展她的交友圈，不至於讓她一人獨大，可惜...來家裡玩的玩伴真的不多，所以可憐的爸爸媽媽都要陪玩！不過最近發現跟她玩家家酒還蠻有意思的，我跟她玩過一次就上癮了，之後再求她，她都不願意跟我玩，哈！！ Your 5-year-old now Five-year-olds make great strides physically. Your child's balance will improve, and she'll throw a ball more fluidly (though catching is still a challenge). Her advancing large and small motor skills make this a great time to expose her to activities that require more complex body coordination, like swimming, tumbling, running a homemade obstacle course, riding a scooter, or ice skating. You might notice an increased restlessness. Five-year-olds are in constant motion and can't seem to sit still. They have better stamina and seldom admit fatigue even when they're truly tired. Physical activity provides a great release for all this coursing energy. Research shows that physical activity helps reduce stress in children and improves their attention span. The American Heart Association recommends at least 30 minutes of enjoyable, varied, moderate-intensity activity for kids every day. Try to make time for physical activity, rain or shine. Kids aren't scared of a little weather. They love stomping in puddles and making snow angels. Your life now Finding yourself hosting a playdate for energetic 5-year-olds? Your child is likely to want to invite new friends over but is still learning how to navigate the social waters. To make playdates go more smoothly: Limit the number of children involved. Ideally, have just one friend over at a time. With three or four, there always seems to be an odd man out. Limit the length of play. One to two hours is usually plenty of time. If the kids seem to be getting along well, you can always extend the time a bit. But it's better to end on a happy note that leaves them wanting more time together than to wait until they disintegrate into bickering or boredom. Stick to your house rules. Maybe at Jake's house the kids are allowed to run in the halls, but if your kids aren't, make the friend adapt to your house rules, not the other way around.
早上我帶小馨去燙髮，她燙了頭髮之後變的很成熟！只是我的補燙就.....唉！當初不該貪小便宜的，原來的捲度比較適合我！嗚嗚
Major collections Collecting is a favorite activity for many 5-year-olds as they notice the similarities between things, as well as differences among like objects. First collections are often whatever's handy and interesting: seashells from the beach, colored gravel bits from the driveway, small toy cars. Some collections endure for years while others are fleeting. Encourage your child by providing a special box or place to store his collection and by creating opportunities to expand it. Your 5-year-old now If your child hasn't started a collection yet, sometime in the coming year you may start finding pinecones in shoeboxes or rocks littering the bedroom floor. Five-year-olds love sorting and categorizing, which helps explain the appeal of collecting. A secondary appeal (to which any adult who collects antiques or knickknacks can relate) is the thrill of the hunt. One big plus to this hobby: You'll see that what kids value, they tend to take really good care of. So the child who's indifferent to a messy room may spend hours organizing his box of rocks and keeping them in perfect order. He may put white rocks in one place, purple ones in another, or his organizational scheme may be much more complex and obscure. Ask him to explain it to you. If he's interested in something enough to collect it, he may also want to learn more about it. Use the collection as a springboard to talking about broader topics, or look for library books that offer kid-appropriate answers: Where do the purple rocks come from? Why are they purple? What are the names of different kinds of rocks? Even at this age, kids can retain information that seems beyond them when they're very interested. And he's apt to want to show off his knowledge to friends and family, building language and social skills. Your life now Parents often focus on academics when thinking about school readiness and how their child will fare. Interestingly, educators say there's another factor that may be more important — social readiness. Signs of this include a child who can separate easily from his parents, who is comfortable talking to other adults, and who wants to interact with other children and can do so pretty well, even if it first requires hanging back to watch for a few minutes.
小馨今天早上很可愛！ 早上我叫她起床，原本以為她會不高興、可能鬧著說還要睡，結果她馬上神智清楚地跟我說：媽媽，今天我會做禮物送你，要快一點，遲到就不能做了！ 我聽了真的很感動，我怎麼這麼幸運，生到她這麼「明理、懂事」的小孩... 小馨，媽媽真的覺得你是上天派來指導媽媽的，媽媽好感恩、好知足啊！
Big talkers Ages 4 and 5 are sometimes called the chatterbox years. Talking is how your child gets a handle on the intricacies of the language and also learns, expresses new ideas, and forms social relationships. So be patient if your 5-year-old doesn't ever seem to pause. This is an important and necessary developmental stage — not to mention a fun one. Hearing her every thought expressed is like having a window into her brain! Your 5-year-old now At 5, your child knows thousands of words and can say most of them clearly. She can describe people and events in detail and uses more complex sentences. In fact, 5-year-olds are often nonstop chatterboxes who like to tell stories, ask questions, or simply share with you every thought that pops into their heads. They're practicing all the language skills they've been picking up over the past few years, and their questions and comments reveal that they're also developing new ways of thinking. Your 5-year-old is fairly reliable about using proper verb tenses now (run, ran). Help her practice using future and past tenses by asking her about what happened at yesterday's playdate or about that upcoming trip to the zoo. Talking with and reading to your child are still the best and most important ways to keep language skills blossoming. Your life now "Find the good and praise it," writer Alex Haley once said. That's great advice for steering your child toward the behavior you'd like to see more of. A few words of approval or nonverbal gestures like a thumbs-up or an affectionate tousle of the hair let your child know that she's on the right track. At the same time, don't go overboard. Save your praise for very specific behaviors. ("I like how you picked up your brother's bottle" is more effective than "Good job.") And use it when your child goes above and beyond rather than for doing routine things like finishing her milk or getting dressed.
Getting enough shut-eye Welcome to the "big kid" years! Of course, your child still looks tiny compared to those 10-year-olds on the playground, but one glance at his baby photos will remind you just how far you've come together. Your 5-year-old no longer naps but still needs a full night's rest. Too little and his behavior may suffer the next day. 哇！！小馨正式進入big kid階段了！！到了五歲就是屬於big kid!! 當然，小馨比起10歲的小朋友還是個小孩，但是只要看看她baby時候的照片，就會驚覺她已經是這麼大了！而且，小馨身高又比同齡小孩來得高，很多時候她看起來就是個大姐姐！ 5歲的小孩幾乎已經不需要午睡了，小馨就是這樣，週末兩天在家，幾乎不用午睡（她在學校仍有午睡時間，但不知道她是否有睡著）。但只要她不午睡，到了晚上6、7點就會特別累，吃晚餐時也會一副快睡著的樣子... Your 5-year-old now While it may seem like your 5-year-old never stops, stop he eventually must — and ideally for at least ten to 12 hours. That's the amount of shuteye the average 5-year-old needs. 天啊！5歲小孩還是需要10-12小時的睡眠啊！那小馨現在每天睡眠都不到10小時，最多9小時而已！！ It's true that some people, including some children, seem to require less sleep than others. But it's generally wise to err on the side of ensuring plenty of zz's. If a 5-year-old doesn't sleep long enough, he may be cranky or have trouble staying focused during the daytime. 沒錯！很早就這樣聽說了！如果小孩子睡眠不足，白天的專注力會不足，學習效果也會減低。其實大人何嘗不是這樣，在這裡工作，每天都緊張兮兮、睡眠不足，白天上班時就顯得很累，精神不濟！ Even though your child seems like a "big kid" compared to just a year ago, he needs a bedtime routine now as much as ever. Familiar rituals soothe and relax your child and prepare him for sleep. 即使他現在5歲了，還是很需要睡眠，需要每天保持定性與規律，才能讓她情緒穩定。 It will help to remove any electronics from his bedroom, as well. Kids who are plugged in have a harder time falling and staying asleep. (Not to mention a litany of other problems, including a higher risk of obesity.) 上面說要將電子用品自她的房間移除，可是啊....小馨到現在都還跟我睡，怎麼辦呢？不過好在的事，她睡前僅有看看電視，最常就是要媽媽講故事，不論是看書講故事，還是媽媽自編故事，她都可以聽得津津有味，呵呵！ Your life now Five marks the beginning of the school years for most children. It's easy to get drawn into a busy whirl of school, play, and activities. But take time for one throwback: updating his baby book or website. Some parents write an annual letter to their child, to be opened on his eighteenth birthday. In it, you could jot down amazing highlights of the previous year, observations about personality and character, and your hopes for the future. If you didn't start doing this from birth, now's a great time to start. 對啊！這的確是個好辦法！現在是一個很好的時間點開始記錄她的成長歷程，或說寫一年一封給小孩的信，直到她18歲（就是上大學的年紀吧！）... 其實，我應該要好好坐下來花時間寫過去5年的信，應該都還印象鮮明才對！ 只不過，要我有時間啊！！或者我這樣的紀錄其實也夠了過去5年的信可以從每個星期的記錄裡面摘錄下來！
今天沒有什麼特殊的活動，就用機車載著小馨及梓熏到處晃晃：草屯買了彩券，中了400元、中興85度C吃蛋糕、喝飲料... 然後下午爸爸開車先帶我們去高美濕地，然後才烏日高鐵站。 很可惜，這次不能到沙灘玩，下次一定去！！
Big-Kid Discipline How will discipline change as your child turns 5? The essentials remain pretty much the same: Have clear rules and be consistent about enforcing them. Remember that your child wants to be good; your goal is to help him stay that way. Be prepared for more challenges to your authority as your child copes with new situations, especially when he starts kindergarten. 小馨愈來愈穩定了，我是指個性上，她也愈來愈瞭解把拔馬麻的底線，大多時候她都能遵守原則不去抵觸，不過，總是5歲孩子，還是有情緒失控的時候！ 其實我真的很幸運有這樣的孩子，有時她會問我，媽媽，你要加班嗎？你不用上德文嗎？她愈來愈能involve大人的世界了，不過我還是希望，她慢慢長大就好，這會是她最天真無邪的時候，也是我們一輩子最美好記憶的時候！ Your 4-year-old now At this age your child still lacks self-control. It can take more than one, two, sometimes ten times for a lesson to sink in. Repeating transgressions is also a way of testing the limits. Are they firm or mushy? If Dad ignores me this time, maybe what I did isn't such a big deal after all. Aggression is a normal phase at this age. Specific situations in which your child feels uncertain or out of control usually trigger the incidents. Respond quickly and calmly. Establish set rules and consequences for antisocial behaviors like hitting and kicking. Not everything needs to be a battle. Overlook small things or give your child a mild verbal warning ("Keep your feet off the sofa") so your messages about the big ones get the emphasis they deserve. Don't get drawn into battles you can't win, such as those over eating. Your life now Congratulations! You've brought your child to the brink of the school years. Whether he'll be moving on to kindergarten or a pre-K program, turning 5 ushers in a year of big things.
Mama! I'm So Mad! Even adults melt down in the face of frustrations like lost keys or a slow Internet connection. Most of the time we try to react in a relatively civilized way, but that's something we've learned through much effort. Your child needs practice to learn to control her strong feelings, too. You can help by teaching her how to identify her emotions and what she can do when she has them. 控制脾氣真的是一輩子的功課，尤其我這個已經當媽的人，遇到不排隊、人行道上騎單車...種種鳥事，都還會忍不住叨叨念念一番，何況是五歲小孩？要他們控制脾氣，需要大人更有耐心，循循善誘地規勸（我想我應該做不來吧！） 像這次春季郊遊回程路上，因為晚上小馨吃了拔絲地瓜，她覺得好吃想再吃，但已經沒了，因此在車上一直咿咿阿阿唸著想吃地瓜....我回她目前在車上，沒辦法買，回去後到family mart再買烤地瓜給她吃，講了幾次不聽，還在whinning，我聽了就覺得煩，忍不住罵了她... 其實她已經五歲，應該懂事了，不過她心裡顯然無法接受，而且可能嘴饞想吃東西，所以才持續whinning，後來車上還有一個水煮玉米M，給她吃後，她就不再whinning了！ Your 4-year-old now One of the greatest gifts you can give your child is teaching her how to calm herself when emotions are boiling over. Self-calming is not an easy thing to learn — or to teach, since most of us are still perfecting the skill. Since you want to catch her before she explodes, you first need to recognize signals that she's about to lose it. Does she whine or lash out verbally? Maybe her body language or tone of voice tells the story. If she's frustrated playing with her blocks, does she clench her teeth? Once you know her cues, you can discuss them with her. The goal is to get her to recognize on her own when she's emotionally on the edge. 話說要在她脾氣爆發前先開導她，那就表示我們要時時注意她的動態，這點應該難不倒我們，我也能判斷出她大概能的脾氣是否快爆開，即使錯過了，也能在事後得知並安慰她。 The next step: teaching some simple anger management and stress relief techniques that will help her cope with strong feelings. It can be as simple as showing her how to take a deep breath: "When you feel like whapping your little brother, stop and take a deep breath and then let it out." Or, "Take a deep breath and count to three, then let the air slowly blow out your mouth." Practice together; eventually it can become second nature. Physical activity lowers stress and clears frustrated minds, so getting outside can help. Warm baths, soft music, a back rub — these kinds of sensory activities soothe as well. "You're beginning to whine and get frustrated. Let's take a bath to help you calm down." Although your child won't be able to give herself a back rub whenever she's frustrated, your doing so helps her learn to identify her strong feelings and realize that it's possible to tame them. Your life now Just because your 4-year-old is turning 5 doesn't mean she has the maturity of a big kid. Brace yourself for a possible meltdown during birthday celebrations. As the high excitement of anticipation meets the event itself (plus presents, sugar, people, maybe a later bedtime), the birthday kid can easily be overwhelmed. Cajoling or reprimanding often only makes things worse. Better to give your celebrant a little quiet time and turn your attention to the guests while she recovers.
早上老公帶她去看病，醫生說是「異位性皮膚炎」....要吃藥、也抹藥
小馨第一次上打擊樂
What Time Is It? Today's kids learn to "tell time" on a digital clock before the analog (faced) type. Once they can recognize numbers, it's easy to rattle them off. Understanding what the numbers represent is harder, and usually begins in kindergarten. The first step is to have a sense of time — you can help by bringing up time frequently in conversation. 小馨對時間還是沒有概念。星期天下午從球池玩回家，上樓時她問我，「媽媽，現在是晚上還是星期一了」？ 有時候下午要她午睡她不肯，因為她擔心「睡一覺起來就是星期一了」...也是啦！星期一總是讓人憂鬱，媽媽也很不喜歡星期一上班日啊！ Your 4-year-old now You can help your child wrap his mind around that tricky concept known as duration — how long something lasts. Being careful with your own language is a starting place. Parents often ask kids to brush their teeth for "a minute," which is a relatively short time. Then we say, "Give me a minute," while we're on the phone. That "minute" can stretch into ten or 20. Giving more accurate estimates helps your child develop his understanding of time. 沒錯！我發現「1分鐘」對小朋友而言還是太抽象了，還不如教他數到60來得實際。舉例來說，小馨不喜歡吹頭髮，因此我就會讓她屬到70或80...這樣吹頭髮就會結束，而她也會很樂意配合這樣做！ Some other ideas: Ask your child to predict how long an activity might last. "How long do you think it will take us to walk around the block?" Provide a stopwatch to keep track. Use a timer for time-outs, but don't set it randomly. Explain exactly how many minutes you're setting it for. (One minute per year of age, or four minutes now, is the rule of thumb.) Use a timer to limit computer or TV time, too, letting your child help set it. Issue fun time-related challenges. "How long can you hop on one foot?" "Can you find all the flags in less than a minute?" Explain time intervals involved in cooking or baking. Set the timer and watch through the oven window to see how long it takes cookies to bake. Your life now Are your child's closets and drawers overflowing? Four-year-olds grow so fast that it's highly unlikely they'll be able to fit into their current wardrobe this time next year. At the end of every season, comb through his clothes, pack up items that are outgrown now or will be next year, and offer the ones in good shape to friends or charity. It will be easier for your child to get dressed with less clutter to sort through. Bonus: This will leave fewer weather-inappropriate choices to bicker over in the morning.
主臥室的國際牌電視壞了，晚上請人來修理，花了NT2500！
It's My Party Many kids coming up on their fifth birthday show a big interest in party planning. (Has your child been counting down for weeks already?)5歲生日！！小馨一直很期待。2月份以後，班上跟她同期的小朋友陸續過了5歲生日，小馨當然也很期待她的生日。（這次我訂了維妮熊的蛋糕，價格不婓：NT 1580） This can be a notable shift from earlier birthdays. Kids this age are famous for strong opinions and big-time sociability, and having been to a party ... or ten ... or 30 ... by now, your birthday kid may be full of ideas. 在這裡，從來沒邀過她的同學來一起慶生，她很想邀、也在四歲生日前就一直提起，但生為父母的我們，一直沒有做出邀請的動作，可能我們自己也害羞不好意思吧！Give her some say, whether you'll be celebrating with just family or a whole passel of friends. Your 4-year-old now Involving your child in her birthday plans is a great way to make her feel responsible and respected. Some suggestions for making both of you happy: You decide the big issues, like where. Don't feel you have to indulge every whim. A party at your home can be much cheaper than going elsewhere — and just as much fun. Let your child pick the theme. This doesn't mean that everything from decor to games needs to reflect Superman or fairy motifs. Most kids this age are satisfied if their cake, plates, and party hats fit the theme. Resist inviting the whole preschool class. It's chaotic, and your child will drown in toys she doesn't need. Better to ask her which friends she really wants; some parents limit guests to one per year of age. Kids typically have more fun in smaller groups. Time it right. One to two hours is the perfect length: enough time for cake, a few games, and some unstructured running around. Remember, they're little kids! Gourmet foods and lavish entertainment are pointless. They want birthday cake, playtime with friends, and maybe a small treat when they go home. Forget the elaborate gift bags — who needs to get into a competition over this stuff? Keep it simple and inexpensive: candy, sidewalk chalk, balls, or balloons suffice. Your life now Instead of chirping "Good job!" incessantly all day, signal your approval in nonverbal ways sometimes. Give a thumbs-up. Lift your eyebrows to a happy expression. Share a hand squeeze. Positive reinforcement is the key to good behavior, and adding to your repertoire of approvals ensures that "good job" doesn't become an empty, tuned-out phrase
Pssst ... Guess What! It's a common sight: Two preschoolers huddled in the corner, whispering. When you ask what they're talking about, one says, "It's a secret." Secrets attract 4-year-olds because they make them feel powerful, possessing knowledge someone else doesn't have. Secrets can be fun, silly, even productive: "Psst! Grandma told me if your bed is neat when she comes, she's going to give you a quarter!" But your child needs to learn to tell and keep secrets with care. 跟四歲小孩講話真的要很小心：有天晚上我們都躺在床上要睡了，但是老公的手機一直傳來line的訊息，後來愈來愈頻繁，吵得我們都無法入睡，因此我起身問了老公是誰....結果是xxx，因此我跟小馨說，這麼晚上她怎麼不睡覺，還在吵別人...真討厭！ 隔天回阿公阿媽家吃飯，正好他們在跟xxx講電話，因此阿媽叫小馨來跟姐姐說話，但小馨說：我不喜歡xxx，媽媽說她很討厭！ 果然很尷尬！ Your 4-year-old now Your child may love to whisper (and holler發牢騷); it's a way of exercising control over his voice. And fours love secrets — possessing information that others don't have. 四歲小孩果然很愛講秘密，每次她湊過身來、貼近我耳邊跟我講秘密，我就覺得她真可愛！Since preschoolers enjoy gaining independence, secrets give them some control. They're deciding how much others need to know. (Be aware: It's a precursor to wanting more privacy.) Kids this age are also figuring out that the words they utter have power — to exclude, hurt, or make someone happy. 很難想像「擁有秘密」這件事，是她「擁有隱私」的先行步驟，小孩真的很可愛，但我還不想要她這麼快長大！ As your child tests out this new power, be watchful for hurt feelings. Relationships with new friends are still fresh territory for him. He's trying to be accepted and figure out where he fits in. If his secrets are exclusionary, leaving others out on purpose, the habit can backfire（事與願違） and leave him feeling wounded when he's the one left out. Discuss with him that some secrets need to be shared (if someone did something inappropriate or when someone could get hurt). But be aware that it's hard for a preschooler to discern the difference between good and bad secrets. So make sure your child knows he can tell you any kind of secret and you won't be angry that he spilled the beans — even if he tells you what you're getting for your birthday. And tell him that if another adult asks him to keep a secret, he should always tell you right away. Unfortunately, as much as we hate to think about it, child sexual abusers exist, and they often prey on children they know or are at least acquainted with. One of the first clues that something's amiss could be that an adult asked him to keep a secret. Your life now Many parents — and preschools — swear by hand sanitizers. But for them to work for your child, you have to make sure he's using the stuff right. A common mistake is not putting enough gel on the hands to start with; give your child a good squirt, not just a dab. Another error: not scrubbing the whole surface of the hand. Lots of germs hide under the nails. 小馨回家後要洗手這件事，老公比我還嚴格執行，現在小馨只要去洗手，就開始玩水、玩泡泡...玩到她心滿意足、我們看不下去才會離開。 There are some downsides to hand sanitizers. Using them often can lead to chafed, dry skin. Watch your child's hands for cracks, which are wide-open doors for infections. And sanitizers can't do battle with really grimy hands, since germs can lurk under the dirt. If hands are visibly dirty, point your child to the good old soap and water. 原來消毒劑的使用不一定好，臺灣有許多公共場所的門口入口處也有酒精消毒劑，我個人並沒有使用的習慣，當然平常也不會讓小孩用，頂多用soap讓她將手洗乾淨而已！
已經快五歲啦！仍然每天都有一些進步、有些不一樣... 今天白天都在玩，也習慣她已經不午睡了，因此想晚上睡覺她應該可以比較快睡著，本想拍拍她，讓她入睡，可是她卻對我說「不用拍拍」... 聽完後有點小小感傷，原來她已經大到可以不用媽媽拍著睡著啦？！三歲前都還要媽媽唱歌，後來不用唱歌、改為拍拍，現在連拍拍都不需要了.... 嗚嗚...小寶貝長大了！
Too Fat? Too Thin? Just Right Weight is, well, a weighty issue these days. We all want children who are healthy and who will grow up avoiding the extremes of both anorexia and obesity. Raising a child with a healthy body goes hand in hand with instilling a positive body image. Your best bet: Focus on whole individuals rather than their appearance. Try to view yourself, your child, and the people around you that way rather than judging everyone's looks. Your 4-year-old now Research shows that kindergartners already believe "thin is beautiful" and "fat is ugly." Television is a big influence. So preschool is not too early to start fostering a positive body image. A great way to start is by not talking about your own body issues. If you're always dieting, complaining about your weight, or jumping on the scale, your children will get the message that these are things they should focus on, too. The same goes for commenting about other people's appearances. Make it a family rule: No unkind comments about others' looks. People come in all shapes and sizes. If you're worried about your child's weight, ask your doctor where she falls on the growth charts in relation to her own past growth pattern. Look at her BMI, or body mass index, a number that reflects the relationship between weight and height. Doctors use BMI numbers as an indication of health and good growth for children starting at age 2. "By itself, BMI doesn't constitute a diagnosis of obesity, but pediatricians use it together with a physical exam, a detailed history from a child's parent or caregiver, and sometimes lab tests to understand how a child is doing, weight-wise," says pediatrican Lisa Simpson, president and CEO of AcademyHealth and a member of the American Academy of Pediatrics Obesity Leadership Workgroup. Size diversity is completely normal, and a high BMI may be a normal expression of a child's genetic inheritance, says Kathy Kater, psychotherapist and author of Healthy Body Image: Teaching Kids to Eat and Love Their Bodies Too! So once you find out your child's numbers, she says, be careful about how you use that information. Rather than trying to control the size and shape of your child, Kater says, put your efforts toward encouraging wholesome behaviors. Studies have shown that trying to manipulate how much kids eat can put them at risk for disordered eating patterns (such as overeating and compulsive eating) in the future. Strange as it may sound, in the long run, restrictions can lead to weight gain rather than healthy weight maintenance. If you're concerned that your child might be heavier than is natural for her, don't restrict her diet or harp about what she should "stop doing" (eating junk food, acting like a couch potato). Instead, set up an environment that encourages good habits. Offer nutrient-rich foods at regular snack times and meals. Limit computer, television, and other screen time. Keep devices with screens out of your child's room. Plan active outings as a family. Exercise helps kids appreciate their body for how it works rather than how it looks. Should you worry about your child's weight if she's active? Read our expert's answer. Of course, some children have trouble gaining enough weight to be healthy. An exam and BMI measurement may help with this, too. If your child has no underlying medical problems causing the failure to gain, offer healthy, calorie-dense meals and snacks. The doctor may also recommend a high-calorie supplement drink containing vitamins and minerals that your child may not be getting. Learn more about helping a child who's underweight. Even if your child's weight seems fine, it's a good idea to create a home environment that supports healthy choices. As a working mom of 10-year-old twins, pediatrician Simpson finds it helpful to use the "5-2-1-0" rule of thumb. "This reminds me every day that we all need five servings of fruits and vegetables, no more than two hours of screen time (including TV and video games), one hour of physical activity and zero – yes, zero – sugar sweetened beverages," she says. Building self-esteem is another prong in the attack against negative self-image. Compliment your child's efforts. Display photos of her around your home and workplace. Above all, never criticize your child's appearance. Even one offhand comment can cancel out a dozen positive ones and linger in the mind far longer. Is it normal that your preschooler keeps saying she's fat? Get the answer. Your life now Kindergarten around the corner means you have just 13 years until ... college. If you haven't started a college savings plan for your child, make it a priority to look at your options. Even modest savings now, $10 a week or $100 a month, say, can grow to a sizeable amount by the time your child turns 17. If your child attends a public elementary school, maybe the money you used to spend on daycare or preschool can start going into a fund. Or look at small savings you can make in your life, such as brewing your own coffee instead of buying it or shopping only sales for kids' clothes. Any little bit you can sock away will help. For dozens more great ideas for frugal families, see our Family Finance Basics.
晚上回家後，老公要帶公婆到宜蘭參加明天一早的喪禮，小馨知道把拔要離開，哭得很傷心，直說把拔不要走.... 後來慢慢跟她說道理，她才漸漸接受讓把拔出門，奇怪，怎麼這麼黏人啊！？
昨天才說不塞車，今天到小人國就被塞到了！其實是六福村的人潮眾多，我們也被影響。，直到11點多才能入園。 入園後人一樣很多啊！每項遊樂設施都要排隊，小孩子根本沒耐性，我陪庭琳玩了一項「跳星星」、陪小馨和梓熏玩了「雲霄飛車」、「碰碰車」.... 庭琳很幸運，被小丑選到一起上台表演！ 回家路上又塞住了，直到5點40到家，小宣一家人已經在我們家了！ 晚上走路搭捷運到七張站，吃陶板屋....晚上小宣一家就開車回台中了！
228放假一天
早上兩個小孩吵著要游泳，結果換了泳衣後試了水溫，才說好冷，只好又回到泡湯區，媽媽沒有泡湯，因為腳不舒服加上懶得再換泳衣，因此就躺在椅子上曬太陽，我也換了泳衣陪小馨去玩水....直到11點才check out! 中午到大湖酒莊，想不到人好多啊！小孩又一直鬧，想買東西、想吃東西、想採草莓....我一個人實在哄不過來，後來簡單吃了午餐，終於可以到草莓園了！ 3個小孩採了三盒草莓，花了1000多元，我們就打道回府、回新店啦！ 沿路都很順暢，完全沒有塞車，不到五點就到家了！ 晚上梓熏在家裡寫了功課，我們買了披薩、炸雞就在家裡吃、喝、玩....
下午休假
Better Ways to Say "Sorry" The point of an apology is to take responsibility for a mistake. But when preschoolers are forced to say they're sorry, they get the message that a few words can erase the wrong. Instead of forcing those words when your child messes up, use the situation as an opportunity to help her learn rules and truly accept responsibility for her mistakes. Your 4-year-old now Learning the words "I'm sorry" comes faster than the genuine feeling behind it. You can't force your child to feel remorseful. Fours are learning to feel and show empathy, a key ingredient to a sincere apology. Egocentrism — thinking about herself foremost — still dominates your child's thinking, though. She won't reliably be able to see a situation from someone else's perspective until age 6 or 7. That said, your 4-year-old is capable of knowing when she's done something wrong that's hurt someone. (Witness the red face, sad demeanor, or guilty look.) Try these ideas to teach your child about apologies: Replace words with actions. Rather than insisting on muttering, "Sorry," teach your child to make amends. A gesture of apology — a hug or shaking hands — holds concrete meaning. So does cleaning up what was broken, picking up what was thrown, and so on. Model verbal apologies yourself. Your child will learn by repetition. Encourage apologies between fighting friends rather than taking charge yourself. Say something like, "Is there something you want to say to each other?" Or, if they haven't caught on to verbal apologies, "How can you make each other feel better about this?" Use positive reinforcement. When you see your child offering an apology and accepting responsibility for her actions, point it out and praise it. Your life now If you're a tea drinker, you already know the astonishing variety available even in your neighborhood grocery. Tea is also safe for your preschooler to drink, provided you choose carefully. Stick to caffeine-free herbal tea, preferably served without sugar or honey added. Many flavors, such as mint or citrus, have a naturally sweet taste. Serve tea slightly cooled or chilled as iced tea. This makes a tasty soda substitute without caffeine, sugar, or calories. Tea shouldn't replace milk, of course.
過年前就約好了，竟然沒來！！可惡！
